


Restaurant Robin

by dysfunctionalbatfam



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Agent A - Freeform, Batman - Freeform, Bruce is a good parent, Bruce regrets adopting his children (not really), Drabble, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Nightwing - Freeform, Oracle - Freeform, Orphan - Freeform, Red Hood - Freeform, Red Robin, Red Robin eats at Red Robin, Restaurant Robin, Robin - Freeform, Signal - Freeform, Tim is tired, bruce is tired, no editing we die like fools, short fic, spoiler - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:33:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22120354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dysfunctionalbatfam/pseuds/dysfunctionalbatfam
Summary: Stephanie lit up again.“This is gonna make a beauuuuutiful headline,” she piped up. “Red Robin eats at Red Robin: 1 dead and 3 injuired.”ORTim (Red Robin) is forced to eat at Red Robin (the burger joint) by his siblings, and is just tired with their shit.
Relationships: Bruce Wayne & Alfred Pennyworth, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Tim Drake & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Alfred Pennyworth, Tim Drake & Barbara Gordon, Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Tim Drake & Cassandra Cain, Tim Drake & Damian Wayne, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson, Tim Drake & Duke Thomas, Tim Drake & Jason Todd, Tim Drake & Stephanie Brown
Comments: 16
Kudos: 328





	Restaurant Robin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nxttime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nxttime/gifts).



> This was written in 15 minutes with no editing, so enjoy

“I’m not sure about this,” Tim grumbled, wringing his arms to try to shake his siblings off of him. He was currently dressed as Red Robin, and being dragged along by the Bats.   


“Yes, you are,” Stephanie cooed, skipping along. “This is a  _ great  _ plan. The  _ bestest _ , if I would.”

“Obviously, ‘ _ bestest _ ’ is not a word, imbecile,” Damian pointed out, but smirked, “But this plan may prove to be quite entertaining.”

“Look, even the brat agrees,” Jason snorted, his strong grip on Tim’s wrist unwavering, and was starting to bruise him. Dick just hummed along behind him, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

Tim ignored the passersby stopping to whisper and snap photos of them. It would be strange, the Bats all clumped together, from a crime lord to the happy Bludhaven’s guardian.

“Oracle. Alfred. Approve.” Cassandra stated, walking quietly at the edge of the clutter. She seemed to be the least energetic, but a faint trace of a smile slipped onto her lips.

Jason snickered and Tim groaned. If  _ Barbara  _ was on him, he’d be screwed if he didn’t go along. But  _ Alfred _ … damn, there was  _ no  _ way around this. Even if he tried to take out all the bats around him, which was nearly impossible, he’s have to face Alfred. Nope.

At least Duke was wise enough to drop out, and Tim would thank him later.

Stephanie seemed to notice Tim’s defeat and her grin stretched even wider. She picked up her pace, stopping in front of the lighted restaurant. The vigilantes received even more looks from the civilians, but they didn’t seem to mind.

“Red Robin, yummm~” Dick sang under his breath, quickly cut off by a sharp jab from Jason and let out an indignant “Ow! What was that for?” It was quickly followed up by “I swear that song is going to be the death of me,” a shit-eating grin (from Jason), and a collective groan from the family and more bickering. 

“I swear if you lash out  _ one more death joke  _ one me, Todd,” Damian threatened, “It won’t be a joke anymore.” In his hand was a knife, and Dick yelped and quickly disarmed him.

“We’ve  _ all  _ died,” Stephanie added, and Tim wanted to facepalm if his arms were not being held captive by Steph and Jason.

“Damian, no names on the field!” Dick continued while Stephanie and Jason burst into an argument. Luckily, they were saved before a fight broke out and the whole place went down in flames.

“What. We came for,” Cass reminded them with a small glare, and everyone quieted and broke off their arguments, followed by a few grumbles. Stephanie lit up again.

“This is gonna make a beauuuuutiful headline,” she piped up. “Red Robin eats at Red Robin: 1 dead and 3 injuired.”

Tim sighed audibly, freeing himself enough to bury his head in his hands. The vigilantes smiled sweetly at the terrified and pale receptionist and ordered six seats. A few waiters noticed the irony and laughed to themselves.

Jason had snapped a photo of Tim’s defeated and tired expression in front of the Red Robin(the restaurant)’s logo, and was posting it on instagram. Damian and Dick were leaned over, both watching the screen in glee.

Dick kept on singing “Red Robin, yum!” While they chowed down on their burgers. The vigilantes were all hungry, no shit, after a long day of patrol, although most of them (definitely not Tim) were bubbling with energy.

They paid with a generous $500 tip (much to the waiter’s shock) and left the restaurant, laughing to themselves, everyone but Tim, Damian, and Cass (in which the other two smirked).

~~~

Bruce groaned, mirroring Tim back at the Batcomputer. He was done with his files and scrolling through his social media as Bruce Wayne (to keep updated and play his part) when he saw the post Jason had made. It was a picture of Red Robin standing in front of Red Robin, looking utterly like he wanted he die. It was tagged with #RestaurantRobin and was immediately blowing up with likes and comments.

Alfred merely smiled behind the chair to himself, slipping out the cave before Bruce could interrogate him.

“Why did I ever adopt them?” Bruce muttered, banging his head against his desk.

**Author's Note:**

> Why is "restaurant" so hard to spell for me? At least I learned something.


End file.
